Hello Perfectionists! ‘I am in constant Do or Die mode’

 

    

          

                 If someone in your family is a perfectionist, be it your sibling, one of your parents or even your spouse, you will be able to identify the plight of a not so perfectionist person living amidst them. Everyone has their fair share of positives and negatives inbuilt in their behaviour and attitude. It is easy to say that you have to accept a person as he or she is, since acceptance is the key for saving a relationship. It would sound cliched, when you constantly remind the perfectionist that they have to cultivate acceptance for every action of yours. Homemakers are always in the ‘fright and flight’ mode or in the ‘do or die’ mode when trying to live up to expectations. We would be in constant fear and would want to escape the situation whereas many others would take painstaking efforts to prove their worth.  

             I believe that, it is fine to analyze whether perfection can be attained 100 percent all the time by the person whom we assume to be a perfectionist. The degree of getting things done perfectly can vary and what I perceive as a perfect job can be perceived as a shoddy work by someone else. So, perfection is not a constant, but a variable factor. It is easy to call a work done as ‘rubbish’, but we should cultivate some empathy when we ‘rubbish’ a work. I remember my days as a writing intern, when my first article was torn to bits of paper and thrown to the dustbin. I, then pledged that I would not do such a mean act without thinking of the well-being of the person in front of me and thus from that day, my quest to uphold empathy started.  Empathy is practiced by all of us at some point of time, even to strangers, but we forget to implement empathy amidst our kith and kin. Empathy according to the Thesaurus means putting yourself in another person’s shoes before we tend to rubbish their efforts, so that we do not ultimately put down their efforts.  The quest to practice empathy should be inculcated in all of us irrespective of position or gender, since it is high time we practice empathy within our family, friends and relatives.

Pointers to take note of: Perfection Vs Empathy

1.      Some actions will be trivial in your view, but never put down the effort even if it is trivial.

2.      Karma is very strong. You will definitely get back what you give with twice the impact.

3.      When someone praises you, that you are a perfectionist, alert yourself and decline the praise. Quote that none should aim for perfection but for excellence.

4.       Perfection is only a state of mind and not real, whereas Empathy is the best problem solver in your relationship with a calming effect.

5.      Live and let live, and do not do and die, since none have the right to impose perfection on us, not even our boss at our work spot.

         Perfection is just an assumption or rather a dominating trend that slowly eats out our happiness. So, the next time around we should always strive for excellence and not perfection. If you want to appreciate an effort, always remember to use the word excellent! instead of perfect, this would make all the difference.